1. When you hold out your arms to hug your spouse,
all of your palms face the same direction.
2. You feel self-conscious if you hear someone
talk about something being “dog-eared.”
3. You have to cover all of your mirrors
to protect them.
4. When you smile, your teeth look like you
stole them from a piranha.
5. When you accidentally put your bra on backwards…
it fits better!
6. You hate to go out dancing, because you REALLY DO
have two left feet.
7. Your spouse has to wear a bag over his/her head
in case the one over your head breaks.
8. You wear your hair in long bangs to cover up the
third eye in the middle of your forehead.
9. Someone says, “Do I look like I have eyes in the back
of my head?” and you’re thinking, “Doesn’t everybody?”
10. Being “all thumbs” is normal for you.
11. You count to ten on your fingers, and have two left over.
12. You go into Medusa’s cave and SHE turns to stone.
13. Whenever you try to comb your hair, your comb
keeps getting stuck on your antennae.
14. You hear someone say, "I only have two hands!" and
you're thinking, "That poor unfortunate creature!"
15. When you go to an airport, the waves from the radar
antenna make your head start to spin.
16. At a Halloween party you try bobbing for apples
and your eyelids rust shut.
17. At that same party, you win the prize for the
scariest costume, except you're not wearing one.
18. You turn off the lights and the room stays lit...
because you glow in the dark.
19. You make a mistake in front of your best friend and
he/she looks at you like you have three heads.
20. The smell of ammonia brings tears to your eyes...
not from irritation, but because it reminds you of home.
21. If anyone gets near you with a magnet, your eyes
start to roll.
22. You pick up a toad and IT gets warts.
23. Poison ivy effects you the way that catnip effects cats.
24. Someone tells you you're looking "green around the gills" and you have to remind him/her that your gills are SUPPOSED to be green.
25. A friend you are talking to gets the hiccups and you think that he/she is coming onto you.